This week I struggled with not feeling content in fulfilling
my purpose in India. At the end of a mission
trip it’s easy to become susceptible to insecurities from the Father of Lies
that I didn’t do all I could do, and will soon be forgotten. I am continuing to
surrender these lies to the Lord! Our
team has formed some friendships outside the Home, but the language barrier has
been the main deterrent from evangelism. Or at least I thought it was. This week I was struck by the conviction: Olivia, if there was no language barrier
would you have done anything differently?… I don’t know the answer to
this question, but based on the pattern of my life what I suppose saddens me. Even
though my teammate has more of a heart for evangelism, and I for discipleship,
our team has discussed and been challenged by the truth that it’s not Biblical
to pass off neglecting a certain ministry as “not having a heart for it.” I believe that the people of India are souls in need of saving. I believe in Jesus’ death and resurrection. I believe in a literal hell, so what is the real problem? Is it pride? Is it fear? I pray that the next season of my life will be
one marked by less excuses and more boldness!
As I prepare my heart to leave India, I know there is a roller
coaster of emotions coming my way. I’m
aching to stay with my boys, I’m anxious to see my family, all the while trying
to stay present-minded in my remaining days here. There is a growing excitement and expectation
stirring inside of me for how God is going to continue to mold me like clay as
I transition back into the American lifestyle. But I pray that I never truly go
back, I pray that I am never the same!
Olivia Auntie
