It has been an incredibly long week. It has been said multiple times that this has been the most exhausting week since the first week we were here. I can’t exactly put a pinpoint on what has been so hard… maybe it has been a collection of things. Maybe it’s the weather. Maybe it’s the fact that we have only 29 days left and we are all aware of it. Maybe it’s because we have been dealing with a lot of sickness. Maybe it’s because we are all women and there is bound to be some drama. Maybe it’s a collection of all these things. However, I can say with all assurance that the ROOT of the effect is Satan.
We are on the last mile. Just a short bit to go. Two things can take place. We can either check out and say, “That’s it, I’m finished. I am exhausted emotionally, mentally, and physically,” and just let the days go by… OR we can push into this last month full force. Honestly, the EASIER option is the first choice. But would that be the most fulfilling use of this time? Would it please the Lord? Obviously not. The word says that nothing that is apart from Him is good… and I know that he wouldn’t command us to give up.
A lot of things have been going on at home while I am here. Mainly, my family ended up having to move again because our house we moved into was toxic with mold. When I heard we had to move, I was shocked. But I sat and praised the Lord. There is nothing apart from His good and perfect will. Praise the Lord that He is so good to us that he pushes us past our breaking point so that we can see our weakness outside of Him. What a blessing it is to have a Savior who puts aside our feelings in order to save our hearts. How blessed am I that my God put me all the way here in India while this is all happening so that I can have a birds-eye view of the situation and bring encouragement to my family that God is ALWAYS in control.
God is always in control. We say that all the time, but do we live by it? Do our hearts express that we believe the words that come out of our mouth? If God is always in control and He uses ALL things to glorify Him and we are told specifically that only the Father knows the plans He has for us, then doesn’t that mean that even the things that seem “bad” to us are going to bow down in submission to the glory of the Father as well? We assume that the people who the Bible speaks of who sing praises of the Lord with their tongues but don’t praise them with their hearts are people who are not Christians and are not walking with the Lord… but I can count numerous times when I have gone to church, gone to Bible studies, sang the songs, and talked to people about Jesus without actually having a heart to desire to do all those things. I also can remember specific times when I have said, “God’s in control. God is sovereign,” and then complained throughout the day about whatever I felt like was “dragging me down”.
Even this week I complained every day about how tired I was and how much I missed home and how finished I was with this. Don’t get me wrong… I love being here and I know that God has me here for a reason, but this week I just didn’t see it. I let the fact that I couldn’t SEE God’s plan dictate how I responded to His plans for me.
The Bible says, “Her mouth speaks from that which fills her heart.” (Luke 6:45) The fruits of your attitude and thoughts present themselves to those around you whether you like it or not. As a follower of Christ, you are COMMANDED to build up the body of Christ. Do you think that it builds our church up when you or I complain about the things that are going on in our lives? Isn’t it much more strengthening and encouraging to hear a story about a person who went through trials and came out praising the Lord because He gave them perseverance and strength to endure? Isn’t it far more pleasing to the Lord and His Body when you are saying “The Lord is perfect in all His plans and all His ways” in the middle of the battle you are going through? Of course it is! Because that gives others the strength they need to persevere when they are faced with something that they don’t understand. Lead by example. Build up the body.
Your life isn’t even your own. You don’t live for you if you are living for Christ. And if you are living for Christ you have shed the outer layer of dead skin that kept you from revealing the Christ in you. You carry your own cross every day and you crucify your own needs, emotions, and desires and trade them in for the desires of our God. Our God wants nothing more than for you to worship Him with your life.
Let’s look at a common Christian phrase: “He does all things for His glory and our good.” I love that phrase when taken at it’s true meaning and value. He really does do all things for His glory and our good… But our definition of “good” is so screwed up. The word “good” in that phrase isn’t OUR form of good. It is HIS form of good. Sometimes His good doesn’t even look good to us. But He knows that the very best thing that he can do for us is to give us the ability to worship Him through times when we can do nothing else. Honestly, most of the time… to the rest of the world, your life may not seem “good”. But because it doesn’t look good to them, you get to explain to them exactly why you still have so much joy. You get the opportunity to tell them that your joy comes from the promise of treasures that are being stored up in heaven for you right now and an everlasting life with the God of all creation. Seems pretty good to me. I think THAT is the true meaning of “He does all things for His glory and our ‘good.'”
I am pretty sure I just went off on a tangent. I am a verbal processor. I like to write and talk things out that are laid on my heart. Sometimes that means 8 paragraphs of ranting about the glory of God and you sitting there thinking, “when is she ever going to stop writing? I get it already!” Truth is… I will probably never stop writing. And honestly I will probably keep writing the same things. I firmly believe that if we really truly grasped things like what I just wrote about, we wouldn’t stray from them or forget to live by them. Sometimes we need it beaten into our hearts and our heads. I can’t beat it into your heart… shoot, I can’t even beat it into my own heart. But I know the Lord can beat it into you as he continues to mold you and put you through fire so that you can come out finished and created into the vessel to pour out His love.
You and I are called to abandon ourselves and seek to take on a new life: the life of Christ. Let’s do it together, building each other up in love, strength, perseverance, truth, and a desire to know our Lord Jesus Christ better.
As for me, you can be praying that I will continue to choose to live by the words that I speak with my lips as an overflow of my heart and that I will continue to die to myself every day so that I can live for Christ. Like Paul says, “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” (Romans 7:15) I desire to live by the truths that the Lord has spoken to me, but often I do things that I don’t want to do without even realizing I am doing them because they are part of my flesh. That is why I must die every day to myself so that I can take on the life of Christ and be apart from sin.
